3 Reasons to Slow Down this Holiday Season

Christmas time is my favorite time of the year.  I love all the holiday festivities going on, which makes for some quality family time and fun memories.  However, last year, I had an experience that nearly ruined the entire holiday season for me.  In some ways, I felt like I missed Christmas.  Let me tell you what happened.

I came up with this bright idea to have a huge family Christmas at my grandma’s house.  After all, she is my only living grandparent and some of my fondest memories were made at her home.  We’d invite all my aunts, uncles, cousins and their families.  It couldn’t be anything but a win in my book.  However, where I got lost was in the shopping.  My wife and I had so many family members of which we just had to get gifts!  On top of that, we were still planning on having Christmas with our kids as well as with my wife’s family; and we didn’t start shopping until Black Friday. I know, I know….a recipe for disaster.  Needless to say, my kids came home with so many toys and clothes that, out of our guilt, we decided to donate many items to charity.  I did manage to make some good memories though, none of which involved presents, but quality time with my family (and great tasting jalapeno poppers).  I just wonder how much more quality that holiday season would have been if I hadn’t have gotten caught up in the madness.

When I think of the “hustle and bustle” of holiday season, I think of crazed holiday shoppers.  Last year, I was one of them.  And because of that experience, I vowed to my wife and myself, “Never again.”  Never again will I allow myself to miss such a meaningful time of the year.  That said, I wanted to offer you a few good reasons to slow down this holiday season and future ones to come.

1.       Your Loved Ones Desire Your Presence, NOT Your Presents

“I'm glad he took our presents. You can't hurt Christmas, Mr. Mayor, because it isn't about the... the gifts or the contest or the fancy lights. That's what Cindy's been trying to tell everyone... and me. I don't need anything more for Christmas than this right here – my family.” ~ Lou Lou Who (How the Grinch Stole Christmas, 2000)

To be completely honest with you, I admit that I am a product of American culture.  I cannot imagine a Christmas without a few presents under the tree.  As a child, I was only concerned with my gifts.  However, as an adult and a parent, I could really care less if I received any presents; but, I sure do enjoy watching my kids (and my wife) open their gifts.  That said, I’d take all of it back to the store if I thought it meant missing out on quality time with my friends and family. 

I know we love to see our friends’ and families’ faces light up when they open up a gift we got them.  But there are so many other ways, through the avenue of quality time, that we can be a part of this phenomenon.  Don’t get me wrong. I think it is perfectly okay to exchange gifts at Christmas, but don’t let it be your main source of enjoyment this holiday season.

    2.       Y.O.L.O. (You Only Live Once)

“Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?” ~ Clarence (It’s a Wonderful Life, 1946)

“You see George, you've really had a wonderful life. Don't you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it away?” ~ Clarence (It’s a Wonderful Life, 1946)

“Yolo” is a term I just recently learned from some college students at my church.  The older I get the further behind on the current lingo I become (note: I don’t think I’ll ever understand how “good” things are “sic”).  I know that over the course of one’s life, Lord willing, we’ll get to experience many Christmases.   However, I would encourage that you think of each Christmas as its own unique experience; therefore, you only get to experience it once.  No two holiday seasons will be the same.  Slow down this December and allow yourself to soak it in.  Pay extra attention to the unique opportunities that this holiday season presents that may not have been present last season? 

Do you know why people went to see the movie Star Wars over and over again on the big screen in the 70’s?  Not only was it an extremely innovative sci-fi flick, but it was also released during a time when cable was fairly new and VCRs didn’t exist, much less, internet streaming (Kinnaman, 2011. p. 40).* Therefore, to the viewers, it was highly possible that access to this film was a “once in a lifetime experience.”  Thus, they soaked in as much of it as they possibly could.  I encourage you from this moment on to treat each of your holiday seasons as “once in a lifetime experiences,” because each year will be unique in its own way.

   3.       Financial Strain ≠ Relational Gain

“I thought maybe we could make ginger bread houses, and eat cookie dough, and go ice skating, and maybe even hold hands.” ~ Buddy the Elf (Elf, 2003)

In the movie Elf, Buddy the Elf goes on an adventure to find his dad in effort to build a relationship with him.  This quote captures his desire to experience all the things he might have missed with his dad as a child; yes, even holding hands.  How many of you grown men still hold hands with your dad.  I would assume, almost none of you. Physical touch is one of many ways we nurture our closest of relationships. To tell you the truth, I dread the day that my boys (ages 5 and 3) no longer want to hold my hand.  I will definitely miss their soft, innocent, little fingers gripped around mine as we cross busy streets, dodge cars in the parking lots, and those wonderful moments where they are leading me to show me something fantastic they’ve created or discovered. It is a great feeling!

Slow down this Christmas and focus on how you can build your relationships with the people you love and care about.  Overspending isn’t going to help you grow closer to your loved ones.  When we overspend, we get a moment of joy as we look upon the faces of the people we have lavished gifts upon.  Save your money and give your time!  For those of you with children, there will most likely be a slight adjustment your children will go through if you decide to cut back on the spending.  But let me ask you this: When you think back upon your Christmases as child, do you remember more about what gifts you received that Christmas; or do you remember the special moments you experienced that Christmas?  Give your children an experience this holiday season; it is much MUCH more meaningful.

I’d like to finish this post by wishing you all a Merry Christmas and the Happiest of Holidays!  Please take a brief moment to share with the rest of us ways that you are creating experiences this holiday season.

            *Kinnaman, D., (2011). You Lost Me. Grand Rapids